“I’m fine.” An innocuous statement at face value, but perhaps the most frequently abused falsehood in all of humanity. I was many things in that moment, but I certainly wasn’t fine. I’d just put my car — one I loved and hoped to keep forever — into the wall at about 60 miles per hour. The driver-side airbag hung limp at my shoulder, brushing against my helmet in the gentle breeze through my open window. The safety marshal whose concerned inquiry prompted my empty assurance had gotten there in a matter of seconds, but even if it had taken minutes, I wasn’t going anywhere. My training had kicked in. Stay in your car unless it is on fire.
It wasn’t, so there I stayed, letting that safety mantra loop through my head because it was preferable to contemplating the reality of my situation. I’d screwed up, and badly. Like any spectacular mess, this was the result of multiple errors, some committed hours, days and even weeks prior. It was an all-too-predictable example of a cascade failure that set me back mentally and financially. And to make matters worse, I knew better. People more experienced than myself had been repeating the same basic advice since the first day I set foot in a track paddock. For the most part, I’d listened. But on one early spring morning, my series of individually minor missteps led me directly into a concrete barrier.
I was reminded of that particular calamity this week when a YouTuber named Chet became the subject of a near-endless stream of dunks after posting a video depicting his rather spectacular shunt in his Tesla Model S Plaid. Presumably, Chet didn’t set out to put his Tesla into a wall at triple-digit speeds, but it was a consequence that many — myself included — found entirely predictable. Hindsight’s funny like that.
If you’re here for the schadenfreude, skip to the end for the rest of my story. But if you’re here because you’re eager to get on track and learn how to drive fast in a safe, educational and spectacularly fun environment, this next part’s for you. Heed this advice, and you could find yourself immersed in a fantastically rewarding hobby.
1 – Don’t modify* your car for the track
See little baby Byron up there? That photo was taken in 2008. 2008 Byron really couldn’t stand the idea of driving a stock vehicle anywhere, so my 6 had an intake, ECU piggyback, lowering springs and a handful of other mods, plus a set of beat-to-crap FD RX-7 wheels wrapped in some unremarkable summer rubber….
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